It’s challenging. One sleeps in a pulse-like rhythm: for hour-at-a-time breaks when the baby sleeps, around the clock. So the baby’s very presence breaks down one's sense of time and temporality, reassembling them into a more cyclic sense. One's world shrinks to a point that radiates out, again - pulses out, through sensory wonder to one's direct environment and one's home. There are also emotional cocktails, rife with senses of failure, accomplishment, amazement, boredom, relief, and terror. Happiness and sadness, hope and dread. There are challenges, a looming sense of bodily or caregiving failure or accomplishment—a binary dance between two polarities. Our focus is united into this pulsating being, shimmering with its pulses.
 
- November 23.